It’s funny but after me and Eamon were joking the other day about the team, turns out that the team is more or less finalised anyway.
But of course, I’m involved. Do I think I’d be an asset to the team or any team in my condition and the fact that I’m currently staring at a brick wall trying out different bricks to see if there is a secret entry to the other side as opposed to climbing over the wall or bulldozing straight through it?
The answer to that overly long question is no, no, I’ve really had better days, much much better days and yet I say nothing. I really should be saying that I’m not really in the best of conditions, even if I stick to my lousy fitness regime for a month there are much better options than me.
For someone who’s game revolves around quickness and thinking on the spot, I have lost a lot of pace and agility that it’s going to take some time to get it back…maybe I’ll just go in goal then and then my fitness won’t be much of an issue for the rest of the team. I will get disappointed if I’m standing there and I see them not taking responsibility and not shooting on sight preferring to pass it instead. I will rage. Rage hard.
But that’s irrelevant as I will be playing outfield mostly anyway…I say mostly but I figure I’ll end up playing all the time. Thing is, I have to remember that the slick Arsenal passing is the way we can play and we’ll have to utilise that fully, heck if we can just enjoy ourselves then I’m content with that.
Wednesday 22 June 2011
Tuesday 21 June 2011
Lavish nice gifts
Interestant! I just felt like opening with that non-word but as I type this out at 0328 hours I have to really stop procrastinating and to do things now and when the moment hits me and not to finish until I’m done.
What’s up? Well I got thinking earlier (as is the way of all these posts) about myself and how I treat others specifically in relationships. It started when I was looking at some of the pictures I had of me from the Paparazzi photo-shoot and thinking “Boy, this was not worth the money at…all”. To tell you the truth it wasn’t really for me anyway and I only booked it as I figured it’d be a nice thing for her but I was sorely mistaken.
Which led me to think of all the times I sort of just threw money around and spent it on things simply because it was asked for. Things that I knew were just a passing fancy and yet I still indulged them in it.
Now then, what lessons have I learned from all this? To be honest with you, not much. Which leads me onto Foxx.
It’s really great talking and heavily flirting with her but I just think to myself have I really learned anything about life? I was saying about things I’d buy and I actually was serious about the fact that if I could I would but I had to ask myself, do I not remember what happened before? Do I not remember the feeling of emptiness when all was said and done? Do I not learn from that mistake? So why are you doing it again?
Okay, I’ll never be able to really buy Foxx anything but that fact you feel this way means come on man, what happens with the next one? Will you be doing the same thing and then when that’s over have the same feeling of emptiness?
You really ought to know by now but you never seem to learn, you say over and over how you’ll never make a mistake again but…you really don’t. I hope for my sake and yours, something happens to kick you into gear.
*sigh* Ohh and while you’re at it Jason, stop running.
What’s up? Well I got thinking earlier (as is the way of all these posts) about myself and how I treat others specifically in relationships. It started when I was looking at some of the pictures I had of me from the Paparazzi photo-shoot and thinking “Boy, this was not worth the money at…all”. To tell you the truth it wasn’t really for me anyway and I only booked it as I figured it’d be a nice thing for her but I was sorely mistaken.
Which led me to think of all the times I sort of just threw money around and spent it on things simply because it was asked for. Things that I knew were just a passing fancy and yet I still indulged them in it.
Now then, what lessons have I learned from all this? To be honest with you, not much. Which leads me onto Foxx.
It’s really great talking and heavily flirting with her but I just think to myself have I really learned anything about life? I was saying about things I’d buy and I actually was serious about the fact that if I could I would but I had to ask myself, do I not remember what happened before? Do I not remember the feeling of emptiness when all was said and done? Do I not learn from that mistake? So why are you doing it again?
Okay, I’ll never be able to really buy Foxx anything but that fact you feel this way means come on man, what happens with the next one? Will you be doing the same thing and then when that’s over have the same feeling of emptiness?
You really ought to know by now but you never seem to learn, you say over and over how you’ll never make a mistake again but…you really don’t. I hope for my sake and yours, something happens to kick you into gear.
*sigh* Ohh and while you’re at it Jason, stop running.
Sunday 12 June 2011
The calm before the storm…or have I said that already?
So now we’re in June. Well what is on my mind. I don’t know, I never actually know nowadays and as much as I’d like to say that it’s all good, the truth is that it could be better but hey…at least things aren’t that bad.
I never know where this optimism stems from but it’s a good thing that I have it as I imagine things would be pretty dark if it weren’t there.
Though it pretty much is all a facade and if you were to ask if “something is wrong” and “am I alright”, I’d respond with a simple yeah I am fine but in the back of my mind, I know…I know something is wrong but I just cannot put my finger on it…or maybe I can and somehow my brain is blocking me from seeing the actual truth.
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